Trust and Transition: Lessons from Jesus

You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. - Isaiah 26:3 ESV

Among my least favorite pastimes is making decisions without having all of the facts. In my career, I spend a copious amount of time interviewing my patients so I can diagnose and treat them in a way that is conducive to all of who they are. When I’ve registered for different sports races, I always zoom in to the course map to scrutinize any sneaky elevation changes or weird routes. Y’all, when I’m going out to eat, I scour the reviews not just of the restaurant, but of my appetizer, entree, and dessert. I’m not here to waste calories on mediocre spinach and artichoke dip, okay?!

You can imagine how this tendency of mine showed up last month, when after about 7 ½  months of praying and planning, we finally felt ready to make a decision on where to move. And then proceeded to spend the next 6 six weeks finalizing job logistics, finding a place to live, booking movers, packing, and also making a conscious effort to wrap up our time in our previous city well. Mix in a surprise bout of COVID and the rollercoasters of real estate = it’s been a wild ride. 

Although 75% of our boxes are unpacked and I’ve identified my closest loyal grocery store and park, I have found it incredibly difficult to feel settled in. Admittedly, it’s been a month, and I’m fully aware that I often brute-force my way through the discomfort of transition. I enjoy adventures on vacations and in restaurants, but I hate feeling anything but cozy and predictable in my day-to-day life. So having moved  across the country with job plans that will be a bit hazy after 3 months has resulted in a dense, sticky wad of uncertainty that has implanted in the depths of my stomach and begun crawling its way up my throat, making it hard to breathe, think, or speak whenever I consider all the things that can go wrong if things don’t work out. 

Having walked with the Lord for several years and having participated in therapy for four of those, I can employ terms like hyperfixation, catastrophizing, and anxiety to name the storm of emotions and mental battles I am experiencing. I’m so grateful that unlike in my youth, I have tools to cope and ground myself in what is in front of me at this very moment. Praise God for wise counsel and mental health professionals, y’all! But above that, praise God for the example we have in His Son Jesus. I regularly imagine myself as one of Jesus’s disciples, observing and recording his rhythms, the way he carried himself and interacted with those around him. Jesus was so countercultural not only in the way he cared for the marginalized of his time, but how he glorified His Father with His time. 

“Now his parents went to Jerusalem every year at the Feast of the Passover. And when he was twelve years old, they went up according to custom. And when the feast was ended, as they were returning, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem. His parents did not know it, but supposing him to be in the group they went a day’s journey, but then they began to search for him among their relatives and acquaintances, and when they did not find him, they returned to Jerusalem, searching for him. After three days they found him in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. And all who heard him were amazed at his understanding and his answers. And when his parents saw him, they were astonished. And his mother said to him, “Son, why have you treated us so? Behold, your father and I have been searching for you in great distress.” And he said to them, “Why were you looking for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?”Luke 2:41-49 ESV

From the time Jesus was a teenage boy (and undoubtedly before), Jesus made it clear that His source was the God of the universe, His Father, and nothing would get in the way of His time with the Lord. Later in his life, Jesus would take time to sneak away and be with God, sometimes spending an entire night in prayer; other times breaking away from the noise and crowds during the day. As a disciple who witnessed Jesus performing countless miracles, healing with the touch of His hand and often just the words of His mouth, I know I would’ve been a complete nuisance. Can you imagine me tapping Jesus on the shoulder and saying, “um, where are you going? You can heal so many more people in this amount of time! We know God is more than pleased with you; it’s fine!” I jest, but as someone who has morphed productivity and organization from good gifts to idols, I appreciate how much humility and faith it took for Jesus to slow down and put first things first. He knew everything that needed to be done before he went to the cross; the feeding of thousands, the healing of countless, correction of the religious elite, resurrection of his close friend, and so much more. And yet, He knew the best way, the only way, to prepare and endure his life was to stay as close to the source of His life as He could. He focused on His Father’s love, and the result is a world redeemed by His blood. 

In these days he went out to the mountain to pray, and all night he continued in prayer to God. – Luke 6:12 ESV

Many times, I fail to follow Christ’s example of living a life of focused faith. Sometimes I go on autopilot, feeling so emboldened that I live life and make decisions without any consultation or intimacy with the Lord. In this, I play God and sorely deceive myself. Sometimes, I  have such a robust prayer life, but I feel immobilized by fear of doing the wrong thing, and am terrified to disappoint a God who has already promised to never leave or forsake me. These are not the only scenarios, but they are the ones I am most familiar with as snippets of my own faith journey. Despite years of knowing Jesus as a Savior and friend, I need regular reminding through the Word, His people, and His Holy Spirit just what that means for my life (and specifically, my anxiety regarding the future). God in His love gave us a perfect Jesus, who would turn the culture on its head to bring low the high and elevate those society had pushed down. Jesus would eventually be wrongly accused and put to death on a cross for the sins of the entire world, so that if we choose to know Him and call Him Savior, we would have eternal life in heaven with Him. 

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act.- Psalm 37:5 ESV

The gift of salvation is the result of Jesus Christ’s focused faith. Every day as I job hunt and wait for our previous home to sell, I am reminded that although these prayers will be answered and I will settle into a routine here, this earth is not my final home. I also feel abundantly safe knowing that when I do feel anxious, doubtful, or upset with the Lord, He will warmly receive my every emotion and can handle each one with tenderness towards me. In the meantime, I can do my best to love others in the way Christ loved us, and to glorify God with how I submit my every anxious thought and potential plan to His perfect love. I don’t know every detail (or let’s be honest, many details at all) of how things will go, but I know I am loved by a God who does. And my new favorite pastime  is focusing on that. 

Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. - Matthew 6:26-33 ESV.